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Who you gonna call

#1 User is offline   babalu1997 

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Posted 2011-October-04, 12:13

So I have this freshly promoted boss. It was a long-awaited promotion, but the individual never impressed me as being very eloquent in public situations. And now, it is evident that the grammar of office memos is just apalling, horrendous, including semantic mistakes which should not be present in an eduacted native speaker of English.

I thought of sending an email to abuse, but the boss does not play bridge.

Since i cannot tell anybody I have to post here.

PS I am a non native speaker, i have an excuse.

View PostFree, on 2011-May-10, 03:57, said:

Babalu just wanted a shoulder to cry on, is that too much to ask for?
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#2 User is offline   BunnyGo 

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Posted 2011-October-04, 12:22

Ghostbusters!

Wow, just read your post...nevermind...

This post has been edited by BunnyGo: 2011-October-04, 12:22

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Never tell the same lie twice. - Elim Garek on the real moral of "The boy who cried wolf"
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#3 User is offline   jjbrr 

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Posted 2011-October-04, 14:56

Also disappointed this isn't about Ghostbusters.

Please post examples of the memos. Fond of ridiculing semantics mistakes I am.

Posted Image
OK
bed
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#4 User is offline   Bbradley62 

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Posted 2011-October-04, 15:16

My boss once sent a memo telling us not to get caught up in menusha.
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#5 User is offline   BunnyGo 

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Posted 2011-October-04, 15:29

View PostBbradley62, on 2011-October-04, 15:16, said:

My boss once sent a memo telling us not to get caught up in menusha.


It seems he meant it, assuming he knew what menusha ment.
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Never tell the same lie twice. - Elim Garek on the real moral of "The boy who cried wolf"
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#6 User is offline   blackshoe 

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Posted 2011-October-04, 16:53

From the urban dictionary:

Quote

1. menusha

An idiot trying to spell minutia.
While it may seem to be minutia, anyone who writes menusha is a ***** dumbass.

2. menusha

***** no one cares about cuz its so stupid; just stuff
You're full of menusha!


Next best-seller: The Decline and Fall of the English Language.

I see that the forum software has done some politically correct editing of this post (replacing two words with asterisks). Be it known that wasn't my idea. <_<
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#7 User is offline   jjbrr 

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Posted 2011-October-04, 17:44

I posted this on facebook in April:

Quote

Email from coworker requesting I make a spreadsheet for her (ms office how does it work?): "Jeremy, you might have some septic ideas to organize."

Touche, coworker. I know my mind is sordid, but septic is a bit harsh.

OK
bed
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#8 User is offline   y66 

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Posted 2011-October-05, 06:19

Call Scott Adams.
If you lose all hope, you can always find it again -- Richard Ford in The Sportswriter
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#9 User is online   kenberg 

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Posted 2011-October-06, 14:05

A friend told me he saw a forum (not a bbo forum) where contributors were asked to tell about "the first time they lost their virginity". I suppose that the fifth time one loses one's virginity is hardly worth talking about.


One of my all time favorites: I was listening to an NPR discussion about a guy who was on death row. The debate got heated and one of the pro-death people opined that "he should just take his punishment and move on with his life".
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#10 User is offline   Cyberyeti 

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Posted 2011-October-07, 09:39

View Postkenberg, on 2011-October-06, 14:05, said:

A friend told me he saw a forum (not a bbo forum) where contributors were asked to tell about "the first time they lost their virginity". I suppose that the fifth time one loses one's virginity is hardly worth talking about.


One of my all time favorites: I was listening to an NPR discussion about a guy who was on death row. The debate got heated and one of the pro-death people opined that "he should just take his punishment and move on with his life".

Famous snooker commentary:

And for those of you watching in black and white, the pink is next to the green.

However my favourite inability to get the right word goes to my late grandmother, who when my father headed off to go snorkeling and a business colleague phoned, told him he was off snogging on the beach.
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#11 User is offline   Zelandakh 

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Posted 2011-October-12, 08:06

One of mine. Upon calling a friend from a public call-box with only one coin I opened with "Hi, I can't talk long, I'm on the phone."
(-: Zel :-)
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#12 User is offline   Free 

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Posted 2011-October-13, 08:51

Do you need another shoulder to cry on Babalu? ;)
"It may be rude to leave to go to the bathroom, but it's downright stupid to sit there and piss yourself" - blackshoe
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#13 User is offline   olegru 

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Posted 2011-October-13, 10:09

Could I cry too? :)

Recently I notice on the wall on my boss’s room among funny cartoons 2 printed E-mails I (not native English speaker) sent when I just started to work there.
The first E-mail contained worlds “erogenous script.” I wanted to print “erroneous” but Freud and spell check succumbed me.

Second E-mail had some story behind. We had Excel spreadsheet updated daily. One day we decided to move all data into database. After migration was completed I sent E-mail what all information now in the database and I will not update this excel sheet anymore. Right after I sent the E-mail I got phone call from one of relatively top-manager, who said what he is completely sharing my opinion about excel but, because I am not-native speaker, he would like to let me know that some words should not be used in the business E-mails.
Surprized by this call I checked my E-mail and found out that I made the most unfortunate spelling mistake in the word sheet. Funny thing the meaning of the E-mail stayed exactly the same.
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#14 User is offline   onoway 

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Posted 2011-October-15, 16:03

View PostZelandakh, on 2011-October-12, 08:06, said:

One of mine. Upon calling a friend from a public call-box with only one coin I opened with "Hi, I can't talk long, I'm on the phone."

One time I was late for an appointment and when stopped in a radar trap for a speeding ticket I said, "I'm in a hurry, will this take long?" it worked out ok tho the policeman warned me about another radar trap set up further along my route B-)
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#15 User is offline   ggwhiz 

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Posted 2011-October-16, 10:05

Just another hall of fame my hero belongs in for quantity and quality. Yogi Berra.

Nobody goes there anymore. It's too crowded.
When a deaf person goes to court is it still called a hearing?
What is baby oil made of?
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#16 User is offline   babalu1997 

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Posted 2011-October-18, 12:42

View Postggwhiz, on 2011-October-16, 10:05, said:

Just another hall of fame my hero belongs in for quantity and quality. Yogi Berra.

Nobody goes there anymore. It's too crowded.


I cant stand it.

The boss went on the radio to invite members of the public to an event.

"There will be a very safe atmosphere. There will be clothed policemen on the grounds and alos underclothes policemen"

( one only hopes the underclothes ones are not the fat ones!!!)

View PostFree, on 2011-May-10, 03:57, said:

Babalu just wanted a shoulder to cry on, is that too much to ask for?
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#17 User is offline   BunnyGo 

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Posted 2011-October-18, 13:04

View Postbabalu1997, on 2011-October-18, 12:42, said:

I cant stand it.

The boss went on the radio to invite members of the public to an event.

"There will be a very safe atmosphere. There will be clothed policemen on the grounds and alos underclothes policemen"

( one only hopes the underclothes ones are not the fat ones!!!)


LOL. I was thinking they were policeman that searched "under" people's "clothes". You know, like bomb detection or something.
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